Right now im pretty dumb.
They say i can have a operishun.
It will make me smart like evrybody else.
I am strong im not scard of it.
Maybe pepul will lik me when I am smart.
The operishun is done.
I dun feel any smarter.
Mrs. Kinnian and the rest say it will come but it takes time.
I'm learning new things all time.
Maybe I am getting smarter,
It don't feel like it though.
For the first time in my life, I see clearly.
New doors open themselves to me everyday.
While there's a lot I don't understand,
I am eager to learn.
My brain has become like a sponge,
it quickly asorbs puddles of knowlege.
I've never felt so alive in my life!
Was I really a person before the experiment?
Did Charlie Gordon die that day, or was he just born?
Where others have reached their intellectual bounderies, I exceed them.
No longer am I just a feeble minded retard,
I have become much more.
No one understands my plight though.
My rapid ascension has pulled me away from those I care most about.
Their feeling of mental superiority is gone.
They now feel greatly inferior to my own wit.
Oh God, i've never felt so lonely in my life.
Yet, I must continue to exceed in my quest for knowledge.
Although i'm mentally superior to the average man,
I'm still just a mere boy when it comes to emotions.
Not just common emotions, but matters of the heart.
I cannot have Alice, she's afriad of what i've become.
I must try to forget about her- for now.
Curiousity tugs on the innards of my mind.
I need more than just intelligence, I need to love, to form a family.
I shall dedicate myself to the project.
Intelligence is a gift, no one should be forsaken.
The retarded aren't sub-humans, they are just as human as you and I.
I was a person before the experiment, Charlie Gordon did exsist.
The original Charlie does exsist, he lives within subconcious.
He watches my every move.
Why can't you leave me to own devices Charlie?
That blank stare, that empty smile...
Stop it! Stop it!
Stay out of my life, you shall not reclaim control!
I am a better man now, it was for the best.
Leave me to think, to love, to love- Alice.
So the old cliché is true, what goes up, must eventually come down.
Algernon is regressing to his former state of mind.
His final condition will foreshadow what ultimatly happens to me.
I must contribute my knowledge to science- while I still have time.
I must go to see my family at least once, to show them i'm normal.
No! That i'm better than normal.
I have made amends with my family, I've finally made them proud.
However, if I was still a retard, would I have been welcomed?
I feel sluggish, slow and irratible.
The first signs of regression?
Algernon has already passed away.
Now it's my turn to complete the circle.
Everything... is... slipping... away from me.
I can no longer understand concepts which once seemed so simple.
I've forgotten how to read other languages.
Old papers and reports no longer make sense to me, although I wrote them.
Alice tried to stand by my side until the end, but i've shunned her away.
She loved me, she cleaned for me, she watched over me, and cared for me.
In the end I became too irratible to tolerate any further contact.
I often spend days at a time in bed.
TV brings me some pleasure, not much.
Oh God, I don't want to lose it all.
It has become hard type, hard to read, hard to think.
My thoughts are too jumbled, I don't know how long I can hold them together.
I'm losing more and more of my vocabulary everyday.
It's just easier to write simple words.
I gave up with the type writer.
I read books but they dont make sense anymore.
Its all starting to go I cant fight it anymore.
Once I used to be real smart.
But now im dumb but I hope to read and mayb ill get smart again.
I got my old werk and friends back.
Its nice to hav friends.
I don no wher im gonna go but ill make evrybody proud.
Ill werk im strong, im not scard ill show evrybody.
Ill be smart someday.
Back to the Lab!